"Days of the Phoenix" • AFI (by Natalye Childress)

mom and dad will say they raised us, but we did our growing up at 201 washington street. davey havok sang about the girl on the wall, but i need you to know, she waited for us all. we were the teenage death boys and girls, high school kids at the one place that seemed to exist just for us. falling into fantasy with our black eyeliner, dickies pants, studded belts, no cell phones. sneaking out of the house to go to the punk rock show and getting grounded the next day. clambering up the skateboard ramps and laying claim to the best view in the house for a sold out show. dancing in the front row, dancing in the lobby, dancing on the side of the stage, dancing onstage. walking up the hill to the 7-11 between sets, buying vanilla coke. sitting on the curb, watching cars drive by. buying demo tapes of our new favorite bands. waiting to hear the last chord ring out before bolting to make curfew. graduating, going off to college, but always coming back to heart center. singing every word, screaming every word. sneaking onto the balcony, hanging out backstage, climbing the fire escape, up on the roof. walking around like we owned the place. running through the parking garage, buying kombucha at the market. drinking in the hallie’s parking lot, drinking at volpi’s, drinking in the backseat of my 1988 volvo. watching friends play their first show onstage. watching friends get married onstage. crushing on the door guy, dating the door guy, marrying the door guy, divorcing the door guy. moving halfway across the world to start anew, but always remembering your roots. falling into yesterday, an offering of a dream. when someone asks you, you tell them the phoenix belonged to everyone. the phoenix belonged to us.

Natalye Childress (she/her) is a Berlin-based editor, writer, translator, and sad punk. Her poetry has been nominated for Best of the Net and appears or is forthcoming in Querencia Press, Frozen Sea, JAKE, wildness, Anthropocene, and elsewhere. She has an MA in creative writing, and her first book, The Aftermath of Forever, was published by Microcosm Publishing. Find her on Twitter (https://x.com/deutschbitte), BlueSky (https://bsky.app/profile/natalye.bsky.social), or Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/natalyereads/).